Some Kindred cultivate mystery, others seek recognition, and a few prefer to inspire enough fear that no one would ever think of questioning them.
Bogdan probably belongs to that last category.
A member of Clan Nosferatu and the Paris Milice, he seeks neither affection nor understanding. He speaks of power, predation and human relationships with the precision of a man who seems to have decided to reduce the world to a succession of mathematical problems.
For him, every relationship has a use, every feeling is a potential weakness, and every individual occupies a place in a system he intends to master.
At least, that is what he claims.
As the conversation unfolds, however, one question becomes unavoidable: what remains of a man who claims to feel nothing, when even the possibility of controlling others is taken away from him?
Babyface wanted to find out.
“Words have no power over me.”
Babyface Good evening, Bogdan. Or should I call you something else? You seem to attach a certain importance to how people address you.
Bogdan Address me by my title, or by what I can do for you. No name affects me. Words have no power over me.
Babyface How amusing. You start by asking me to use a title, then explain that words do not matter. But let's move on. If you had to describe yourself in three words?
Bogdan Calculating. Sovereign. Pragmatic.
Babyface Sovereign? An interesting choice for someone living under a Prince's authority.
Bogdan True sovereignty is not a matter of title or territory. It is the ability to decide for yourself, without depending on someone else's will. I acknowledge an authority's value only insofar as it has the means to exercise it.
Babyface And what do you appreciate in others?
Bogdan Malleability, predictability and discretion.
Babyface Not loyalty? Intelligence? Honesty?
Bogdan Intelligence is useless if it is unpredictable. Loyalty has value only when it rests on clearly defined interests. As for honesty, that generally depends on what the other person thinks they stand to gain.
Babyface You must be a wonderfully relaxing person to spend time with.
A conversation does not always need an answer in order to continue.
“I never needed to be a monster.”
Babyface Let's go back a little. Before your Embrace. When you were human. What is your happiest memory?
Bogdan The day I understood that I could do something irreparable without feeling the slightest remorse.
Babyface Your first murder?
Bogdan Yes. I felt neither guilt nor regret. Only perfect clarity of mind. The certainty that the laws and prohibitions governing others did not affect me in the same way.
Babyface You also mentioned murdering your father. You were eleven.
Bogdan It is a day I could relive. Not for its emotional significance, but for the precision of the act and the impunity that followed. I discovered very early that the limits imposed by others could be crossed.
Babyface You know, most people associate childhood with memories that are a little less... final.
Bogdan Most people are of no interest.
Babyface I'm beginning to understand why you value discretion so highly.
Babyface lets a few moments pass before continuing.
Babyface And when you became a vampire? Did you feel anything in particular?
Bogdan Satisfaction. My new condition finally matched what I had always felt. I no longer needed to pretend that I belonged in the same category as everyone else.
Babyface Yet you had a beating heart. Breath. Human warmth. Don't you miss any of it?
Bogdan My pulse, sometimes. It was an excellent camouflage tool. Today I must spend Blood to simulate certain biological functions that used to cost me nothing.
Babyface You are probably my first guest to tell me that what you miss about life is a cardiovascular system that works for free.
“The Beast is an insult to my intelligence.”
Babyface Let's discuss your present condition. You seem perfectly satisfied with being a vampire.
Bogdan Predation, at least, is an honest relationship. The strong feed; the weak endure. Human morality is merely a construction designed to conceal that reality.
Babyface So you like everything about your new existence?
Bogdan No. There is the Beast.
Babyface The Beast?
Bogdan A stupid, chaotic, animal impulse. I can spend decades preparing a plan of absolute precision and see it all compromised by an uncontrolled reaction. Anger, fear, a flame. It is an aberration.
Babyface You just said the word “fear”.
Bogdan I said the Beast could cause fear. That does not mean I am governed by it.
Babyface Yet losing control frightens you.
Bogdan Obviously. Nothing is more intolerable than seeing your own mind become the instrument of a primitive will.
Babyface So you are afraid of something.
Bogdan I am aware of a risk. The distinction matters.
Babyface It certainly matters to you.
This time, Babyface does not try to prolong the discussion. Sometimes a distinction tells us more about the person making it than about the reality it purports to describe.
“Friendship is a transaction.”
Babyface Let's talk about other people. You belong to a coterie. At the very least, then, you must maintain relationships with your companions.
Bogdan A coterie is a tool for collective survival. Its value lies in the complementary abilities of its members.
Babyface A rather cold way to describe people with whom you have been through some difficult situations.
Bogdan Shared difficulties do not necessarily produce affection. They demonstrate skills, resilience and forms of mutual dependence.
Babyface And if you had to entrust your existence to one of them?
Bogdan I would choose whoever had the greatest interest in keeping me alive. A companion whose survival or status depended on my own existence.
Babyface So you wouldn't choose the one who loves you most?
Bogdan Love is an unstable variable. Self-interest is far more reliable.
Babyface You know, some people stay with someone when they have absolutely nothing to gain.
Bogdan Then they are making a poor calculation.
Babyface Or perhaps they aren't calculating.
Bogdan That is precisely the problem.
Babyface Speaking of love, do you really not believe in it?
Bogdan I never have. Emotional dependence is merely a biological weakness. It impairs judgement, causes irrational behaviour and gives your adversaries leverage.
Babyface Yet when I ask what you would sacrifice for someone who matters to you, you say you could give up your resources, your territories, your allies, and even sacrifice thousands of innocents.
Bogdan If preserving that individual provides a benefit greater than the cost of the sacrifice, yes.
Babyface Of course. A simple accounting exercise.
Bogdan Exactly.
Babyface I wonder how that person would feel on learning that you assessed their value before deciding to save them.
Bogdan If they are intelligent, they should be reassured.
“I prefer to be feared.”
Babyface You chose Machiavelli's The Prince as the work that represents you. Not very surprising.
Bogdan Machiavelli understood that good intentions do not sustain power. Cruelty can be necessary when applied precisely and in pursuit of an objective.
Babyface You also admire Augustus, the first Roman emperor.
Bogdan He understood how to exercise absolute authority while preserving the appearance of existing institutions. It is a superior form of power.
Babyface And François Villon? As someone living in Paris, what do you think of a Prince whose authority rests precisely on institutions, networks and long-standing loyalties?
Bogdan I reject the principle that age automatically confers competence. The Camarilla places too much value on age. An Elder does not necessarily become more intelligent by surviving three centuries.
Babyface An opinion I would advise you not to voice too loudly in certain Paris salons.
Bogdan It is not a question of volume, but of circumstances.
Babyface Would you rather be loved, respected or feared?
Bogdan Feared. Love can turn to hatred. Respect disappears when interests change. Rational fear is a far more effective instrument of stability.
Babyface Interesting. You seem to think everyone should eventually obey you, yet you categorically refuse to submit yourself.
Bogdan I will never willingly submit to a Blood Bond. Never. I would prefer Final Death.
Babyface So you demand a dependence from others that you find intolerable for yourself.
Bogdan I never claimed to seek equality.
“Absolute control does not exist.”
Babyface You talk a great deal about perfection, strategy and calculation. But you have also admitted to telling yourself a lie.
Bogdan I sometimes overestimate my ability to control the Beast through intelligence alone.
Babyface Sometimes?
Bogdan Intelligence does not remove the constraints of our nature. It merely allows us to anticipate them better.
Babyface And what truth would you rather no one discovered?
Bogdan That my absolute freedom is probably an illusion. We all belong to a chain of predation far older than ourselves. I can understand some of its mechanisms and exploit others, but I am not certain I can free myself from it entirely.
Babyface That almost sounds like humility.
Bogdan Do not confuse clear-sightedness with modesty.
Babyface I wouldn't dare.
Bogdan I do not merely wish to be the most powerful figure in a hierarchy. I want to become independent of every hierarchy. Of time, Princes and powers beyond us. Even of the Beast.
Babyface So you want to be free of all influence.
Bogdan Absolutely.
Babyface Including your own desires?
Bogdan does not elaborate. Babyface chooses not to press him.
“Eternity is a problem to solve.”
Babyface Let's change the subject a little. You chose Bach's The Art of Fugue as your music for eternity.
Bogdan It is perfect mathematical architecture. Every variation follows a logic. Every voice has its place in the whole.
Babyface So you find beauty in order?
Bogdan In precision.
Babyface And your favourite place in Paris?
Bogdan The Catacombs. Entire generations of mortals were reduced to bones, then arranged methodically. Poor, noble, powerful, anonymous. All end up in the same place. It demonstrates the vanity of their social distinctions.
Babyface You do find something fascinating about the dead, though.
Bogdan About what they reveal of the human condition.
Babyface And if you had a night without danger, obligations or anyone to answer to?
Bogdan I would settle at the top of the Eiffel Tower. I would watch Paris, the movements of its inhabitants, the lights, the flow of traffic. Without intervening. Simply to contemplate the whole.
Babyface For once, then, you wouldn't try to manipulate anyone?
Bogdan Observation is part of the process of understanding.
Babyface You really cannot give yourself an evening off.
“Even my disappearance would be a decision.”
Babyface What is your greatest regret?
Bogdan A hesitation. A moment of distraction that compromised a plan and forced me to spend another thirty years correcting its consequences.
Babyface Thirty years to repair a single mistake?
Bogdan A significant mistake can have consequences across several generations.
Babyface And what would you like to have achieved in a hundred years?
Bogdan An invulnerable position. Rivals neutralised, power structures under control, independence complete enough that my will can no longer be obstructed.
Babyface You know no position remains invulnerable forever.
Bogdan That is no reason to give up on building one.
Babyface Your worst enemy?
Bogdan Time. Not because it might kill me, but because eternity can eventually destroy the mind. Boredom, repetition, intellectual fatigue. One day, even a perfectly designed machine can stop working.
Babyface And your ideal death?
Bogdan A disappearance I had prepared myself. I would choose its circumstances, timing and consequences. If I must leave this chessboard, my absence must become an event no one anticipated.
Babyface You even want to arrange your own end.
Bogdan I refuse to leave such an important decision to chance.
Babyface And what sentence would you leave behind?
Bogdan “Do not try to understand my end. Instead, ask which piece I moved to make my disappearance your worst problem.”
The last question
Babyface closes her notes.
Babyface We are reaching the end of this interview. You have told me a great deal about power, independence, control and your contempt for human weaknesses.
I would like to ask one last question.
Imagine you were absolutely alone. Not merely isolated in a haven or abandoned by your coterie. Alone in nothingness.
No one to manipulate. No empire to build. No rival to destroy. No one to obey you, fear you, or even speak your name.
Who would you be, Bogdan?
For the first time in the interview, the conversation no longer seems to be about other people.
Bogdan That is precisely the question I hoped you would not ask.
Babyface Why?
Bogdan Because without anyone to manipulate, without an adversary or power to exercise, there would be nothing left to measure.
Babyface But someone would remain.
A silence.
Bogdan That's why I'd kill you last, Babyface.
She does not answer immediately.
Babyface Last?
A slight smile.
Babyface I suppose I should consider that a favour.
End of the interview.
Babyface's perspective
There is something fascinating about Bogdan. Not his cruelty, which unfortunately does not distinguish him from so many other Kindred, nor his intelligence, of which he is perfectly aware. It is the energy he puts into denying anything that might escape his will.
He does not want to be loved, because love means acknowledging another person's existence as something other than an instrument. He prefers to be feared because fear seems easier to measure. He despises feelings, yet cannot bear the idea of losing control. He claims to have no attachments, while conceiving of considerable sacrifices to preserve an ally he deems indispensable.
And above all, he wants to be free.
An absolute freedom in which nothing and no one could constrain him. Not even his own Blood.
Yet his entire system rests on others. He needs adversaries to defeat, minds to understand, power relations to change and witnesses capable of measuring his superiority.
I asked him who he would be if all of that disappeared.
He did not answer.
He threatened me.
That is not quite the same thing.
I do not know whether Bogdan truly feels as little as he claims. I only know that he puts a great deal of feeling into explaining why feelings do not matter.
As for his promise to kill me last, I take it very seriously.
But I must admit one thing: for someone who believes in neither love nor friendship, he has a particularly curious way of making you feel that you matter.
Babyface
The Midnight Confessions, Paris la Nuit.